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I had been hired to work at a big auto event a few years ago. My hair was very white at the time and some people say my ears are elfish when my hair is pulled behind them, so they wanted me to be some kind of earth-protecting warrior elf ushering in a new experimental car that burns hydrogen (BMW). In marketing myself I sometimes present weird things, but this was over the top and something I wouldn't have come up with on my own.

I was supposed to walk across a fog covered stage and through a gateway to the car. They wanted to use me for my height. Their car has a very tall body and they needed it to look a bit smaller. So the elf, me - at my 190cm, had to strap on some *frightening* boots that added about 20cm to my height. I'm extremely thin in the first place and must have looked just wrong and silly at 210cm.

All of this came together at the last minute. I was nervously trying to walk in these boots that were both unstable and too small for my feet. It was extremely un-elvish (or at least what I thought an elf should be).

The lights went down, the music came up - the lady who was steadying me gave me a little push and said something in German I didn't understand. I gave my fiercest look to the crowd and marched as best I could to the gate with huge warrior spear in my right hand.

The lights were really bright and I was looking at the tape marks on the floor to see where I was going. Fog was pouring onto the floor making navigation interesting at best.

The gate was basically a doorframe with fancy trimming on it. A doorframe that was made for a 200 or, at best, a 205 cm door. 210 cm is more than 205 and it really hurt when my head hit the frame. I heard a gasp go up from the crowd and made a mental note that his was probably my last job with BMW.

Regaining what little dignity i had, I ducked under the gateway and marched over towards the car.

When I banged my head I also twisted my left foot a bit and my right boot had worked loose. After about three steps it came off and I fell to the floor. Trying to find my balance I instinctively threw the spear. It may not have been an Olympic class throw, but it did manage to hit the car

The announcer said something in German and the crowd laughed and then applauded as I got up.

Not many of us get a chance to throw a spear at the product they are promoting. I managed to dent the car and was worried about damages, but they paid. I haven't worked there since though.

The other was holding some animals for a baby animal press conference at the local zoo. I love animals and volunteered for this. I had a little brown bear cub. As I got up with him, nature called and he managed to pee and poop all over my "Kobenhavn Zoo" t-shirt and my super expensive tailored jeans (which came free as a perk from an earlier job). The little guy held quite a bit of liquid! Again the audience applauded. Bear pee is *really* strong. It was a one hour bike ride home.